The Piglet family hasn’t been having much luck lately. We call it La scoumoune. I’m not quite sure of the origin of the word, I believe that it is Arabic but it’s commonly used in the infamous HLM cities in France (social housing concrete jungles) along with “avoir la mauvaise oeil” as a way of saying that you’re very unlucky. According to Wiktionnaire it’s of latin origin, but whatever it’s origin we seem to have it!
Our unluckiness has now lasted over a year, starting with the Fondue fork incident last February. It has spread like a virus through various aspects of our lives including health, financial, work and more recently our home move.
If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you will know that we were supposed to move into our new home in the country on March 28th but that the current owners wouldn’t move out! They didn’t even notify us that they were refusing to move until 10 days before we were due to move in! After six weeks living with the in-laws I cannot even begin to explain my desperation and how I felt.
Legally, they have no right to delay and we can sue them and seek interest and damages but as anyone who knows the French system we may as well dream on. We are going to try and seek some damages but the thought of having another legal battle and ongoing dealings with them (albeit through an avocat) and additional expense leaves us cold. We tried to reason with them and were told that we were nasty, evil people. We were called liars (they obviously can’t read the contract we all signed agreeing the date!), we were told that we were trying to evict them from their home and that we were causing ill health. It got to the point where Mr Piglet stopped updating me on what was happening as he could see it was causing much stress and heartache… I’d never envisaged becoming a Mother in such circumstances.
At one stage, I wanted to pull out of the sale completely but common sense prevailed – it had been so difficult to find a suitable house that I couldn’t bear starting the search again, 9 months pregnant!
Finally, after 10 days of legal battles, the owners have agreed to move out on April 18th and we have managed to convince the removal company to slot us in from the 19th onwards. I hope this is the end of our bad luck period as I cannot imagine another year of bad luck and thinking whatever could come next. They say bad luck comes in 3’s but in our case this last year it’s been in 3 dozens…
As you can see by the pregnancy counter in my side bar, time is ticking and Little Miss Piglet will soon be here. In fact, she is due to arrive anytime now according to the hospitals midwife as she is sitting very low and I am having frequent contractions! I doubt that we’ll be in the new house before she gets here, but now I’m learning to relax and accept what will be will be.
Having our first child in totally unplanned circumstances (to the point where I don’t even know in which hospital I will give birth) is not something I had ever planned and certainly not something I had wanted, but it is what life has dealt me and I am grateful to even be pregnant. My priority now is my little baby and I can’t wait to meet her, but if she can wait another few weeks for Mummy and Daddy Piglet to move in, we would be grateful.
They say things happen for a reason and I’m yet to discover what reasons are behind all of this. Has life dealt you with some unexpected delays/news which you were grateful for afterwards?
Sorry you’re having such problems with the current ex-owners. Moving house in France (maybe anywhere?) is really a nightmare and so stressful when people take it upon themselves to be awkward.
The fact that you cannot rely on the system to help you is really the last straw.
You’re right to try and let it wash over you and concentrate on the baby. Let your husband take the strain.
*hugs*
Thanks Sarah! I think moving house anywhere is stressful and I can remember that we had a bad time with the solicitors when we purchased our UK property… they were so slow! Thankfully our first purchase in France was a dream so that makes this one feel even more like a nightmare!
I’m glad my Hubby is so good at looking after me
Poor you! I can’t even imagine what’s it like when you’re about to have a baby and want to set up a new home for her and the previous owners won’t move out! This is just horrible! I truly hope they’re gonna have their asses kicked on the 18th and that will be last you EVER see of them.
As for your question, I applied for the three different High Schools after writing the exams and I didn’t get to any of them. My GPA was very, very good, but I didn’t have good marks from the final exams – only average (it was the time when my mom had breast cancer and had an operation). In the end, panic struck, we’ve found a private High School. I was supposed to go there for one year only, but I’ve stayed for whole 3 years and passed International Baccalaureate. So it was totally worth the wait.
Right now, I’m trying to think positive and convince myself that everything happens for a reason, because I still don’t have a job. I have no idea what to do, tbh, and it’s pretty daunting. I think everyone needs to go through “something” to make them realise that not everything comes easily and to appreciate even more what we have.
In few months time you’ll forget about these bad lucks and that’s what I wish you.
First of all I’m sorry to read that your Mum had breast cancer, I hope she made a full recovery and that it is a term which will never enter your household again xxx
Your story reference school just goes to show, you’re so right, it was totally worth the wait! As to getting a job, well you will, when the right thing comes along.
When I was 18 I had NO idea what I wanted to do, I just knew that I didn’t want to continue studying! I did a few short term jobs and eventually (by age 22) set up my own business. I’m now 30 and still working for myself – it’s heaven! I know that if I’d known exactly what I wanted to do age 18 I would have gone down the career path and wouldn’t enjoy the freedom I do now.
I hope you find your path soon, listen to your instincts and never be afraid of anything.
Good luck!
Just try and keep in mind that sooner rather than later it will all become apparent….maybe all frigging around now is protecting you from something else…..we will see!
Keep breathing…. x
am breathing! yes, maybe the delay in the move is to delay the physical stress and the long car journey thus delaying labour? I sure hope so as I would love to hang on to her until we move!
All of this is, truly, amazing! I can’t believe house sellers can just decide to ‘stay’. Honestly, I don’t get that!
And you’re ‘only’ 9 months pregnant! Well yes, that’s the most important thing now – let husband concentrate on the boring stuff! Good luck – you’ll look back and laugh eventually
yep, well they can! We had to serve them with a mise en demeure giving them 7 days to complete on the Acte de Vente, which of course they didn’t do! Every day after that we can claim damages and interest (or withdraw if we wanted) but that has to go through the court system which takes forever in France… I have had a court case ongoing for the last 5 years and still can’t see an end so don’t know if I can be bothered but Mr Piglet is determined to make them pay!
I’ve always worked on the principle…
Some people stand in a pile of pooh and they smell of
pooh. Others stand in the same pooh and they smell of Roses.
Dear Piglet I admire not only your courage and patience, but your tenacity – you are wise to move on as continued contact with these morons could begin to eat away at you.
Mr and Mrs Moron do not seem to have a handle on reality and do not appear to even be on the same planet. How can anyone with a charitable heart see you in such a condition and cause you and Mr Piglet so much stress.
Miss Piglet will be here soon enough and she is sure to make her presence felt and will certainly keep you and Mr P on your trotters
and this incident will soon be forgotten as you start your new life in the country
Not long now
PiP
thanks! I love your expression ref standing in a pile of pooh! I would like to think I come out smelling of roses but I think I just smell of turd!
I am sorry you are having such a difficult time. However, i do live life with these premises..
“Everything does happen for a reason”- You may not not find out why for days or even months, but you will. You’ll be standing in the grocery isle and it will hit you. WOW! That’s why!
..and it usually is the something negative you remember that finished with a more positive outcome. I guess that is how life propels us forward.
“What goes around, comes around.” – Don’t worry. All the good Karma you put out there eventually comes back- double. All the bad karma people put out there comes back at them in triples. So < your nasty people who won't move out. Have no worries. The universe will take care of them. Unfortunately, for these type of people they are too stupid to realize it! They just think there life sucks. NOT realizing they are the cause of their own despair.
Hang in there, take care of yourself, your hubby, and your little. Have faith.
Thanks for your comments & insight! I too totally believe in karma but sometimes I wonder “why?”. I always treat people how I would like to be treated and hope that will mean I am treated correctly, but recently it seems as if it’s just one thing after another (most of which I haven’t blogged about) so I’m at my wits end.
I do hope that I’ll have a revelation in the grocery store one day, I’m beginning to go with the theory I suggested to Poulette above! This whole delay is to delay the long car journey for the move!
May I commiserate!! My first baby was born four months early and I wished at the time, that I was on another planet…it was all so surreal and overwhelming…filled with medical, financial and emotional struggles and anxiety…we thought he (and we), would never survive – he had so many challenges to overcome…however he is now 17 (and challenging for different reasons).
My point is that things in life seem to come and go, what is that saying…’Grey skies don’t last forever’ (?) Things never remain static for too long, hang on to the little things, be grateful (not always easy), and accept where you are at…the world is not ending, although it might feel that way…..you will survive and prevail. One day you will look back and remember these days with a chuckle – who said it would be easy! Life isn’t always as we plan it.
Take care and bon courage,
Janine
Janine, thank you so much for sharing your story. A 4 month premature baby is nothing short of a miracle, I am so glad that everything worked out for you and that the challenges were overcome. You must be so proud and emotional about that period of your life, I know I would be. I remember when I was at 28 weeks and told to seriously rest as I was at risk of giving birth early – I was terrified that I literally laid down and didn’t move unless I had to go to the toilet or get dressed. Now 10 weeks later I am feeling much more relaxed but that terror is still there.
As I read your comment the sun came out and it did in my heart too… I had not heard the expression “grey skies do not last forever” but I will certainly remember it now and will remind myself of it in the future.
Thank you again for commenting and for your lovely expression
Yes, life has dealt me unexpected delays / news on numerous occasions for which, at the time, I could find no rhythm or reason and for which much later on I understood and was grateful. So hang in there!
I admire your courage, your attitude, and your falcon of taking it as it comes. Your beautiful baby girl will be born into much love and adventure!
All the very, very best luck and positive energy,
Charley
Thank you so much Charley! I hope that I will enjoy understanding things later on but it’s reassuring to know that others have found understanding at a later date!
As for my courage and attitude, I cannot quite believe how I am reacting, it is totally the opposite to me but I have been overcome by a calm – it must be pregnancy. I have heard that becoming a parent changes you, maybe I have already started going through that change? I never really knew what people meant but I feel more able to deal with situations and keep calm than before.
I am looking forward to her arrival and know that she will come when she is ready.
xxx
Oh how dreadful! You seem to have an optimistic outlook, which is good! Why did they refuse to move out?
They never believed that we would be able to buy so they didn’t think to start looking for alternative accommodation – as simple as that! Really, how daft! We kept them informed via the agent, our and their notary every step of the way, when we got the mortgage offer etc and when we went to set the date they were like “oh well we’re not moving yet as we don’t have anywhere to go, we didn’t think you were going to buy!” – so much for the contract we signed!
We later learned that they had told their notary they didn’t believe that we were serious and had asked how they could make sure the deposit cheque we had written would not bounce should we pull out!
Oh man…I would change all the locks on your new place as soon as you move in. And remember, this will one day be a distant memory, but as for why it is happening to you…you got me! Take care M
yup! we’re so totally going to do that! In fact, my Dad has already offered to make it his first chore when he gets here just days after we move in!
Poor Piglet! Keep your eyes peeled for that window, you know the one that opens every time a door closes in your face. Somehow the universe is trying to gently guide you in a certain direction! But where and why, that’s the question.
Works for me! Take care x
Bub is of course the most important thing now, so just put it out of your mind (as much as you can) and relax. Try sewing
Hi Kirsty, I have found my window of opportunity, it is one to explore new crafts and ways of keeping myself busy and relaxing. I have taken up knitting and decopatch and have to admit I’m having a whale of a time! Okay, so my creations are VERY basic but I’m getting there and Little Miss Piglet is not allowed to arrive until I have finished her blanket!
Life has dealt us all sorts of unexpected, un-wished for surprises but the great thing about yours is that at the end, you will have a new baby girl. And a new home, sooner or later.
As long as you have that lovely husband and baby, the rest is not really that important.
Remember, “home” is where your loved ones are ..
I sure hope she hangs on until you move, I understand completely about wanting to build your “nest” and settle in.
love and best wishes, C
Thank you Candice! I sure hope she hangs on in there as well… I would love her to have a bedroom to come home to but I recently found out newborns can barely see so I’m quite relieved by that fact!
I’m finding it impossible to nest here but am concentrating all my efforts into knitting her a blanket
I am so sorry…just when you need to be tranquil….do hope Piglette can be a little patient.
Your husband was right not to keep updating you…stress and strain you do not need.
You do wonder why there is a ‘system’ which you have to pay for when in reality the other side can just thumb their noses at you.
Best wishes for you all.
Thank you Fly for your support. Unfortunately this is proving to be like so many things in the French system (and no doubt other countries systems as well), the people who the system is supposed to protect aren’t protected. End. Of.
Mr Piglet has been fantastic, I feel sorry for him as he has a lot of stress at work as well but I know the safe arrival of his daughter will more than make it up for him. I’m trying to keep my hormones in check in the meantime!
I agree with PiP. It’s your perception of things.
My only suggestion to you is to let it go. Concentrate on the things you know for sure and the things that are happy and positive. ‘Things’ happen to remind you that you can’t and don’t need to control everything…and to remind you that there are some serious freakin’ morons out there. Holy bejeezus!
Roll with the punches Piglet; you’ll get through. Baby Piglet will arrive all happy and pink and gorgeous. That’s the important thing. She’ll make you quickly forget all this bad stuff. This is all just small potatoes in comparison to the sweet little girl just waiting to make her appearance.
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your expression “small potatoes” – it’s so sweet and means so much at the same time!
I’ve given up battling, what will be will be.
xxx
You have indeed had quite a run of bad luck but try to stay positive as I’m sure it will change soon..beginning of course with the arrival of your little girl. Will be looking out for news on FB. xxxx
Thanks Ayak! I hope your daughter is doing okay too and is managing to stay positive despite her bedrest!
Just read about this today (yes, I’ve arrived a bit late!)
What a horrific situation! And what horrible people!
Your attitude is amazing. May your move on the 19th be the last of this drama and then you can happily welcome Little Miss Piglet in to her new home.
In the meantime, you might need another couple of those ice cream desserts to keep your strength up.